Afterwards single ladies posted those remarks on social media with some inclusions of their own. “Yeah, you need to get busy and do your priesthood duty!” That for me 20-year-old refrain doesn’t inspire anything positive and is inspired more by issues within them rather than any issue I have.
That’s why I absolutely loved Elder Holland’s remarks at the conclusion of General Conference entitled “Tomorrow the Lord Will Do Wonders Among You.” Conference indeed presents high ideals, from which many of our own personal situations seem far removed. How ever can we bridge the gap?
Elder Holland reminded us how the Atonement makes our improvement possible and that trying is what counts, even if we sometimes fail. As I’ve said before, it’s not about the destination; it’s about the journey.
See the similarities
I struggled for many years with dating. Because I own my life, I take responsibility for how my life has turned out. That means the story I tell to explain why I’m still single lays the fault on me. It’s not that I didn’t want to be married. I just didn’t have the right attitude or project the right image to attract the type of woman I really wanted.
True, most of my dating invitations failed miserably. For many years I felt trapped because my eternity seemed completely outside my control at the mercy of others who could never see the real me. But because I now own my life, I accept I wasn’t doing a good enough job of showing the real me to them.
What always annoyed me were the ladies who always threw marriage quotes from General Authorities in my face. When I did manage to work up the courage to ask them out, they rejected my invitations in ways that made me feel completely worthless.
Ladies, if you want us brethren to ask you out more, then you need to own your life and approach us more effectively. I understand you’re frustrated in not receiving the dating invitations you want. You feel trapped because your eternity seems completely outside your control at the mercy of others who don’t seem to see the real you. That’s not very different from the experience I and other single LDS men have had.
Can we all come to a place where we start to see the potential in each other rather than the problems? Can we see each other the way God sees us, as brothers and sisters on the same eternal journey who have much more in common than we do different? I answer with a resounding yes. And Elder Holland’s recent conference talk shows us how.
What a glorious perspective! Too often we focus on the destination and consider ourselves as “less” because we haven’t yet arrived. Yet God sees us as “striving to be more” and so should we! It’s about the journey and not the destination!
Elder Holland continues:
Just because we don’t see the way forward doesn’t mean it isn’t there. It is there. And when we partner with the Lord, He will not only help us to see the reality of the blessings we want but also provide help to secure them. After all, He created this world in which we are journeying!
I love this perspective from Elder Holland:
Let’s extend that grace to our neighbor. Let’s see each other more as God sees us. Let’s divert our energy from criticizing others for their failings to helping them overcome the obstacles that impede their journey home. In so doing, we’ll accelerate our own journey to the same heavenly destination.
Tomorrow the Lord will do wonders among you because today He will do wonders with you and within you when you partner with Him, rely on His marvelous Atonement, and keep trying. May God bless each one of us so to do.
Howdy! I'm Lance, host of Joy in the Journey Radio. I've been blogging about LDS singles life since 2012, and since 2018 I've been producing a weekly Internet radio show to help LDS singles have more joy in their journey and bring all Latter-day Saints together. Let's engage a conversation that will increase the faith of LDS singles and bring singles and marrieds together in a true unity of the faith.
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