Because our brains are designed to follow instructions, we store sets of instructions (a.k.a. habits) for our brains to follow. That allows us to do things without having to think about them.
Habits are so useful that we make them for practically everything in our lives. The way you get to and from work, the stores where you shop, where you sit in church on Sunday — we channel just about everything into habits because automating processes makes life easier.
Habits aren't all rosy
But habits have a not so great side. Because your brain is designed not to think but to follow instructions, you will continue to follow instructions regardless of the result. This is why people can get caught in a never-ending cycle of failure.
Many such persons will ask, “What’s wrong with me?” But often there’s nothing wrong with them. They’re just following a set of instructions — exactly what they’re designed to do. The problem often lies in their instructions. Thus, the real question is “What’s wrong with my habits?”
Our habits influence everything — how we think, how we perceive the world around us, and how we interact with others. Many singles remain single because their habits keep them single. We are often our own worst obstacles, and many of us don’t even know it!
You can say you want what you want all you want. Your brain is still hardwired to follow the instructions encoded in your habits. Absent a conscious choice, you will always follow instructions because that’s what you were designed to do. And as long as you think the same way and do the same things, you’ll get the same results.
Old habits die hard
It’s not easy, but you can change. How? You use your God-gifted agency. By making conscious choices, you harness a power that used repeatedly can break old habits and forge new ones.
The trick then is to learn what habits prevent you from having the life you want and then make the conscious choices necessary to replace those bad habits with better ones designed to
lead you to where you want to be. Then you can just let your brain do what it’s designed to do. Your new instructions will set you on your way.
Plus the journey will be way more enjoyable. That’s a pretty sweet bonus.
That’s precisely what my book offers. It details a process to increase awareness of your habits and replace them with better ones designed to lead you to the life you truly want.
Of course, there’s a catch. Actually, there’s two.
1. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution. We’re all unique. I can detail a process, but the answers you get from that process will differ from the answers I get.
2. A single application will not likely solve your problem. You’ll more likely need multiple iterations to bring you to your desired destination.
These stipulations turn a lot of people off. Living in the age of instant everything, they want THE ANSWER delivered on their doorstep overnight.
But nature takes time to go from planting to harvesting. If you want to get out of your rut and get on the path to the life you want while enjoying yourself along the way, and you are willing to take the time necessary to change, then my book is definitely for you.
Great things coming soon
Speaking of my book, my editor (a college professor) has provided some outstanding review comments. But because she agreed to edit my book for free, the busy school season soon adjusted her priorities. That’s completely understandable. Now with the school year closing, I hope to have a finished manuscript by the end of summer.
I’m also working on promotion and distribution. Long story short, I recanted my decade-plus refusal to join Facebook and Twitter. So expect some links with social media.
The Lord is opening the doors, and I’m excited for what the future offers. I hope you will all join me on this journey by commenting on my posts and sharing your ideas with everyone.
Howdy! I'm Lance, host of Joy in the Journey Radio. I've been blogging about LDS singles life since 2012, and now I produce a weekly radio show to help LDS singles have more joy in their journey and bring all Latter-day Saints together. Let's engage a conversation that will increase the faith of LDS singles and bring singles and marrieds together in a true unity of the faith.
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