Joy In The Journey Radio
  • Home
  • Radio 4 LDS Singles
    • Recent Shows >
      • 9 Nov 22
      • 2 Nov 22
    • Archive 2022
    • Archive 2021
    • Archive 2020
    • Archive 2019
    • Archive 2018
  • LDS Singles Blog
  • Members
    • Members-only
  • World of TED
  • Firesides
  • Books
  • FAQ
  • Volunteer
  • Home-centered Church
  • Donate
  • Contact

continue the conversation

Watch the self-talk

5/7/2014

0 Comments

 
Picture
We all have times when we feel overwhelmed by life.  That’s just a part of the ride.  Yet some of us are quite frankly overwhelming ourselves.  In short, we simply talk ourselves into being overwhelmed.

Singles are especially prone to this effect.  How exactly are we overwhelming ourselves?  We aren’t watching our self-talk, and so when we get down, we tend to stay down because we keep reminding ourselves how horrible our lives are and even how horrible we ourselves are.

We all tend to believe those messages that we receive repeatedly.  That’s the way we are wired as human beings.  In fact, we will tend to accept a false message as true if the lie is repeated often enough.  Many of us singles wallow in the mire so much that we come to believe the lies we tell ourselves.  For example,

“It’s all his/her fault.”

“If only I weren’t so imperfect, I’d be better off.”

“I’m worthless.”

“Who would want someone like me?”

Recognize any of these?  Maybe you could add to the list.  Regardless, I think you get the point.  If you constantly tell yourself that you are in the mire, then you will think yourself there whether you are there in reality or not.  And the reality is that most of us just aren’t there, no matter what hardship or setback we have experienced.

Picture
If you want to rise above your challenges, you need to surround yourself with positive reinforcement.  That includes everything in your life, from media to friends and family and especially yourself.  Granted some influences you will not be able to remove from your life, like a coworker that just cuts across your grain.  But you can provide plenty more positive influences to drown out the negative.

Your best source of positive reinforcement

And guess what your best source of positive reinforcement is?  You are.  You can make conscious choices to give yourself messages of encouragement and faith that keep your gaze focused on the future and the brighter tomorrow that your Heavenly Father wants you to have.

And you can start today.  Reciting scriptures or singing hymns are great options, but they are not your only ones.  You can craft your own mantra that you repeat to yourself constantly throughout the day.

Make your own mantra

Picture
The best mantra to select is one that addresses your own unique challenge.  Then when the challenge rears its ugly head, you can bash it back into place.  Let’s use the examples of deprecating self-talk I offered earlier to illustrate how this works.

Instead of saying, “It’s all his/her fault,” you could instead own your life.  Accept responsibility for the contribution you made to your failure and work on improving yourself so that you’ll do better next time.  Then when reminders of your previous failure come knocking, just beat them back with confident rebuttals based on your actions for moving forward.

Instead of saying, “If only I weren’t so imperfect, I’d be better off,” remind yourself of your strengths and talents — the things that you do well.  Remember, your focus determines your reality.  So focus on what you have instead of on what you lack.  Then your reality will be one of abundance rather than scarcity.

Instead of saying, “I’m worthless,” remind yourself of your divine heritage as a child of God and your commitment to follow the plan He has created for you.

Instead of saying, “Who would want someone like me?” ask yourself instead “Who wouldn’t want someone like me?”  Then follow up by reciting to yourself the characteristics that make you a great choice.

Get out of your way

In many ways we are our own worst obstacle.  If only we could get out of our own way.

The good news is that we can!  It starts by making conscious choices to step outside ourselves so that we can recognize the messages we give ourselves, evaluate those messages, and then make changes where needed.  You can be your own best champion.  Just make sure that the cheer you give yourself is correct, consistent, and constant.
Picture
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Author

    Howdy! I'm Lance, host of Joy in the Journey Radio. I've been blogging about LDS singles life since 2012, and since 2018 I've been producing a weekly Internet radio show and podcast to help LDS singles have  more joy in their journey and bring all Latter-day Saints together. Let's engage a conversation that will increase the faith of LDS singles and bring singles and marrieds together in a true unity of the faith.

    Comment

    Joy in the Journey Radio encourages the free discussion of ideas but reserves the right to remove and/or block comments which do not conform to LDS standards.

    Donate

    Joy in the Journey Radio offers many free resources to help LDS singles everywhere, but it certainly isn't free!  Help Joy in the Journey Radio in its mission to improve the lives of LDS singles by donating today.

    Posts by Month

    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014

    Categories

    All
    Adrian Ochoa
    Agency
    Assumptions
    Atonement
    Attitude
    Attraction
    Autopilot
    Balance
    Becky Craven
    Believe
    Best Life
    Bradley R Wilcox
    Camille N Johnson
    Change The Culture
    Changing LDS Singles Culture
    Christ
    Christmas
    Clark G Gilbert
    Confidence
    Conscious Choices
    Covenant Mindset
    Dale G Renlund
    Dallin H Oaks
    Dating
    David A Bednar
    Depression
    Dieter F Uchtdorf
    Discipleship
    Donald L Hallstrom
    D Todd Christofferson
    Face To Face
    Faith
    Family
    Family History
    Fear
    Filters
    Finances
    Focus Determines Reality
    Full Life: Body
    Full Life: Heart
    Full Life: Mind
    Full Life: Spirit
    Future
    Gary E Stevenson
    General Conference
    Gerrit W Gong
    Goals
    Gordon B Hinckley
    Gratitude
    Habits
    Happiness
    Hope
    Jack Gerard
    Jean Bingham
    Jeffrey R Holland
    John A McCune
    John C Pingree Jr
    Journey
    Joy
    Leaders
    Legacy
    Life Of Meaning
    Live In The Moment
    Marriage
    Marrieds
    Michael A Dunn
    Michelle Craig
    Miracles
    M Russell Ballard
    Natural Mindset
    Neil Andersen
    Opportunity
    Own Your Life
    Partner With The Lord
    Peace
    Personal Ministry
    Perspective
    Philosophy
    Proclamation On The Family
    Quentin L Cook
    Real
    Reformat And Reboot
    Relationships
    Ronald Rasband
    Russell M Nelson
    Sacrament
    Self Talk
    Self-talk
    Service
    Sharon Eubank
    Stories
    Support
    Surrender To Love
    Susan H Porter
    Taylor G Godoy
    Temple
    Thinking
    Thomas S Monson
    Trials
    Unity
    Valentine's Day
    Vision
    Walk By Faith
    Yoon Hwan Choi
    Zion

    RSS Feed

Offerings

Home
Radio 4 LDS Singles
LDS Singles Blog
Books
Speaking
Recipes
Home-centered Church

Production

About
Staff

Support

FAQ
Volunteer
Donate
Contact
Joy in the Journey Radio is a production
of Aspire Mountain Media LLC.
© 2014-2022 Aspire Mountain Media LLC.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

  • Home
  • Radio 4 LDS Singles
    • Recent Shows >
      • 9 Nov 22
      • 2 Nov 22
    • Archive 2022
    • Archive 2021
    • Archive 2020
    • Archive 2019
    • Archive 2018
  • LDS Singles Blog
  • Members
    • Members-only
  • World of TED
  • Firesides
  • Books
  • FAQ
  • Volunteer
  • Home-centered Church
  • Donate
  • Contact