Last week I posted about the need for many singles to let go of the preconceived life plan our subculture hands us. This is actually good for everyone, married or single, to do. But how exactly is that done?
In my post last week, I advocated two specific actions: (1) Develop a strong relationship with God, and (2) adopt a personal ministry. Sounds easy enough .... until the rubber hits the road. Again, the question remains. How exactly is that done? And how does that help you to live your best life?
The answer involves the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
Get good with God
Any endeavor needs a strong foundation to support everything that follows. The best foundation for life is a strong relationship with God. So get to know He who designed this mortal experience.
Christ’s Atonement allows a relationship between God and mankind to exist and thrive. But God will force no one to heaven. So you have to show Him you want that relationship. He wants it so much He immediately does His part when you do yours.
How do you go about building that relationship? Well, how do you build any relationship? Through frequent good faith interaction. So how’s your relationship? Do you counsel with God in prayer? Do you regularly visit Him in His house? When did you last repent? You know the list. What frequent good faith interactions do you have with God?
Having that foundational relationship with God is essential. You’ll need it for what follows.
Get good with yourself
Getting good with God involves learning more about the gospel, including the general plan He created for all His children. But there’s also a specific plan He can help you create for your life.
Put another way, getting good with God allows you to counsel with Him as you decide what your life plan should be.
We weren’t put on this planet merely to follow directions. We have agency so we can “do many things of [our] own free will and bring to pass much righteousness” (D&C 58:27). And earlier in that same verse the Lord declares that “men [and women] should be anxiously engaged in a good cause.”
That’s where a personal ministry comes in. A personal ministry lets you live your best life by making the best contribution you can today. That maximizes your attractiveness, and that gives you the best probability that a potential companion will both accept you and be more compatible with you, giving you a better foundation for a better marriage.
It also fulfills the Savior’s instruction to “be anxiously engaged in a good cause.”
How exactly do you know what your personal ministry should be? Start by looking at your talents. Your patriarchal blessing may provide some insight. What are you good at? What do you like doing? How can you use that to contribute positively to your world?
When you have those questions answered, counsel with God regarding your plan. A strong relationship with God lets you best hear and understand His still, small voice. And it lets you best feel His assurance of support when the plan that’s right for you becomes apparent.
Get good with life
Get good with God by developing a strong relationship with Him. Get good with yourself by adopting a personal ministry. Then you’re ready to get good with life. You can better focus on what you can do and stop focusing on what you can’t. You can more easily believe in possibility and align yourself with probability. You’ll start feeling like the world is your oyster. And guess what? It is and always has been.
You don’t have to control every detail of your life. The Atonement can change you. You can let go of the life plan our subculture has handed us and embrace the life plan you create in counsel with God.
The Atonement also helps us to transcend the difficulties of life, whatever they may be, filling us with confidence that God will not abandon us. He did, after all, allow His Only Begotten Son to die for us.
I can’t begin to tell you how pivotal these two actions are for letting go and enjoying life. The more lax I become in either my relationship with God or my personal ministry, the more lost I feel and the more disagreeable life seems. Conversely, the more diligent I am towards both my relationship with God and my personal ministry, the more life seems to fit together. And the more I savor living, despite my single status in a family-centered culture.
Let the Atonement of Jesus Christ transform your life. Strengthen your relationship with God and adopt your personal ministry. Then watch the joys of life unfold for you.
Howdy! I'm Lance, host of Joy in the Journey Radio. I've been blogging about LDS singles life since 2012, and since 2018 I've been producing a weekly Internet radio show to help LDS singles have more joy in their journey and bring all Latter-day Saints together. Let's engage a conversation that will increase the faith of LDS singles and bring singles and marrieds together in a true unity of the faith.
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